Left Side Too?

My friends Heather and Tatum came to visit this morning. It is good to have friends supporting you through tough times.

Doug and I were chatting with them when Doug shared he had a nightmare last night that Jenson had severe brain damage and was like an adult infant. As you can imagine, this nightmare hits a little too close to home so he started to get emotional. I hugged him and we all cried.

Then the doctors came in let us know Jenson also has a couple places on the left side of his brain that appear damaged from lack of oxygen. This would explain why his right foot since Monday has been stuck in pointed position. No one can tell us whether they will be temporary or permanent.

They also talked about if we need to do a second bone marrow transplant how we would go about it. I only processed about 25% of it because I was still reeling from the new information that not only do we have a bleed on the right side of the brain but also have damage on the left side. When does the bad news stop?

Once all the doctors, residents, fellows, and nurses left the room, I started weeping. My friends wept with me and hugged me.

How are you supposed to cope with all of this? I felt before like I was hanging on by my fingertips. Now I am hanging on by my brittle fingernails.

Sydney on the other hand is handling things the way you are supposed to... acknowledging things but not allowing worry to rob her of joy. She is an amazing kid. She has been staying with my parents since we have been in the hospital and adapting to all the changes this week.

My mom and dad were eating frozen yogurt with her last night when out of the blue she said, "Grandma, is Jenson going to need more of my cells?". My mom replied, "He might Sydney. How do you feel about that?".

Sydney's reply, "That's fine," like it would be no problem to help him again. It makes me so thankful I have a daughter with such a helping spirit.

The FISH test which will tell us more about engraftment levels just went out today so is due back mid-next week. His CT scan today showed the bleed on the right side is still present but stable (meaning not bleeding more).

Now we pray for the blood to be absorbed into the body and no permanent brain damage.

Kristin