Today was just what I needed... a snuggle day all day long with my sweet boy. He leaned his head on my shoulder and I put my cheek on his head while I held his hand the entire day. My friends Lyne' and Denise took care of everything else for us - water, lunch, getting nurses, etc.
Jenson is struggling for every breath now and needs morphine breathing treatments (which I didn't even know existed) every 2-3 hours. I hate feeling so helpless as my child struggles so much, but the only thing I can do is love him with all my heart.
He continues to have many visitors from people who work in the hospital and have also fallen in love with him over time. Dr Cavalier (our amazing oncologist) stopped by and you could see the heartbreak in her face that another precious child was losing the battle here on earth.
I have to keep reminding myself this is his temporary home. Where he belongs is pain free forever in heaven. I have been listening to the song "Temporary Home" and crying with sadness and joy everytime I hear the lyrics near the end of the song. I substitute "young boy" for "old man" when I sing it:
Young boy hospital bed
The room is filled with people he loves
And he whispers "Don't cry for me, I'll see you all someday"
He looks up and says, "I can see God's face"
This is my temporary home
It's not where I belong
Windows and rooms
That I'm passing through
This was just a stop
On the way to where I'm going
I'm not afraid because I know
This was my temporary home
Time to Remember
12 years ago
Praying for more treasured moments like this and for peace for Jenson and your family as Jenson makes his transition to his forever home.... -Stephanie (LoveBomb)
ReplyDeleteWhat can I say or do? I feel so helpless in what I can do for you guys. If I say I'm praying for you, I know that is powerful, but really what I'm I saying when I say that? My life moves forward with petty problems (most of which I created). But you Kristin, Doug, Sydney & Jenson suffer. I'm sure the good times are bitter sweet. grace...
ReplyDeleteHere's another song you might like:
ReplyDeleteBe Still by The Fray
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vtp-p7qFI2I
Carrie has another song on her new album. I think of you and Jensen.
ReplyDeleteSee you again....
Sometimes I feel my heart is breaking
But I stay strong and I hold on cause I know
I’ll see you again, oh
This is not where it ends
I will carry you with me, yeah yeah
"Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face...And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." 1Cor. 13:12-13. Sending lots of love and prayer your way, dear friends. Xo Kathy
ReplyDeleteEvery morning I struggle to hold back tears as I drive past your parents old house here in Danville... at night, I read your blog and I am unable to stop crying. I am so sad for all of you and so angry that you or any parent should have to go through this. I know that my words in no way help at all, I just wanted to tell you that I pray for all of you daily and my thoughts are with you.
ReplyDeleteYou are an amazing family with incredible love and courage. We are praying for you frequently throughout the day. Love to your family. Charlotte
ReplyDeleteDear Aaron family,
ReplyDeleteI just wanted you to know I read your blog everyday, and I think about little Jenson all the time. I wanted to come to Dallas to see you guys, but I just didn't know if I could do it with out breaking down. I remember so many cute things about Jenson and it makes me smile, one was he actually let ME rub his back so Dad could go to the bathroom for a minute. I was so excited, then he made me stop when dad came back! Another was he had the room at the end of the hall with the best view of the helipad, I heard the helicopter coming and I ran in and we turned the lights off to watch it land! He was so excited, and I loved seeing his big smile! You have an amazing, wonderful family and Jenson is an amazing little guy! My prayers are with you.
Karla Davis
Children's Legacy Campus
Praying for Jenson to feel the love he has spread around him and to get moments where he doesn't feel the pain. Praying for Sydney to get better very soon. And praying for Doug and you to stay strong and feel at peace. Steph (LoveBomb)
ReplyDeleteDear Kristin, Doug & Sydney,
ReplyDeleteI am so terribly sorry to hear about what's happening to baby Jenson. It truly is heartbreaking even though we know that he will be safe and sound in the arms of Jesus.
I pray that God will rain down His love and comfort abundantly onto your entire family, especially onto baby Jenson.
Dear family, you are so so loved. You are in our thoughts and prayers. May the peace of God fill your heart.
With love,
Gloria
My heart breaks as I read your blog. I'm praying for all of you to feel God's arms around you holding you up and comforting you in this terrible time.
ReplyDeleteCindy Terrel
*slipping the tiniest love bombs under Sydney and Jenson's pillows* as lights all over the world are shining just for you in love hope and prayer for your precious family...
ReplyDeleteTrashstar
I'm praying for your entire family. I know the boat you're in because I have been in your shoes. Hang in there and even though you may not understand why this is happening to your family remember everything happens for a reason. Hold on tight to your faith.
ReplyDeleteThere are no words to express to make you feel better. I just wanted you to know that you and your family are in my thoughts. I check your blog about five times a day to read for updates. I am glad you have faith because I do not have anymore faith for my disabled daughter. I thank you for sharing your life with us and please know you are thought of during this time. I totally think life is unfair.
ReplyDeleteTake care,
Nicole